I don't want you to fade/ I don't want you to slip away/ I've tried but it seems that I've failed/
The weakness in me has stained/It won't washed away/ It won't let me sleep or get through the day
Song: Is You by Shannon Noll
I couldn't quite remember the amount of times I did this.
Running myself ragged until exhaustion made me stumble, phasing back into my human form just as I was about to fold onto the ground in an unmoving heap of pain; going home only once I'd gotten so tired that I could do nothing but crash into a dreamless sleep.
Sometimes, when the pain was too great—when the memories were too vivid, when my feelings were too raw—I would continue to run, run until my mind blanked, until instincts took over and my human side disappeared with the added distance.
Like the memory of kissing her—the memory of when her lips came alive against mine—God, that was the worst and best of it all. The bittersweet memory of when she finally told me that she loved me—really loved me—that was a slow, agonizing pain that made my heart ached in ways that I never knew it could. Our long walks down the beach, they way we muddled through mud and rain on our motorcycles, every memory brought another fresh bout of pain that bullied my heart into submission.
I didn't know how long I laid there in the rain and the mind numbing pain, but when the sun broke through the clouds and touched everything within my sight with gold, I figured out what I had to do.
I promised her, and damn myself if I didn't stick to it.
I stood up with a jerk of my body and wiped the rain from my face with a trembling hand. Shaking my long hair, I snapped my head back and let loose a determined howl that trickled out of my human throat and exited through my wolf one.
And I ran. This time, to her and not from her.
I promised her that I will always be there for her, so now… I had a wedding to go to.
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