Promises to Keep-7The Constant Promise

BellaPOV

Jacob stared when I got out of the car and stumbled not only once but twice along the gravel road that led to Emily's house, he took my hand with an exaggerated sigh, shaking his head and chuckling all the while. "Only you, Bella."

"Its not like I can help it." I protested which only made him chuckle harder, my eyes unsconciously drinking in his laughing face but the calm and relief that I felt from his safety was quickly replaced by nerves.

"What is it?" He asked when he noticed I was lagging behind. My fingers twisting in his.

I stared nervously at the pretty house that was still familiar to me after all this time, my eyes shifted to his when I felt him squeeze my fingers, naturally detecting my anxiety. "It'll be fine, Bella."

"Bella!"

Curious when Jacob groaned and rolled his eyes, I peeked out from Jacob's back to see who the owner of the strange but familiar voice and managed not to stare with open mouth shock when somebody who vaguely looked like Seth ran incredibly fast toward us, the grin on his face as brilliant as the sun.

"Seth, down." Jacob muttered, Seth slowed down to a jog, the grin turned impish but not even close to repentant. He reminded me more than ever of how Jacob used to be, and also of how I felt every time I saw Jacob before his change. Seth shot off vertically--not as tall as Jacob but tall enough to create a shadow when he reached me--and filled out, very much like Jacob did.

Long and lean like a grey hound--no pun intended.

His dark eyes glinted with mischief and recklessness and my mind clouded with worry of what will happen, my hand that was tucked in Jacob's hands tightened around his fingers.

"Oof!" My fingers tore out of Jacob's as Seth threw his arms around me and lifted me inches from the ground. It seemed that Jacob's enthusiasm rubbed off on him too.

"Sam said you brought trouble with you." He grinned at me, still holding me up without batting an eyelash.

He ducked and shifted his feet, dodging Jacob's hand that flashed out to hit the back of his head.

"Remember that talk we had about tact, Seth?" Jacob lifted an eyebrow at the younger version of himself.

Both Seth and I scoffed at him.

"What?" He asked, offended.

"I don't think you're the best person to lecture about tact, Jacob." I answered.

"I know how to be tactful."

"Mm."

"I do."

Seth and I exchanged glances then rolled our eyes.

"Sure, Jake."

"Yeah, you got loads of tact."

"You're the very soul of tact."

"Shut up. And put her down already, sheesh."

Seth merely grinned and put me gently on my feet before leading the way to the house. "Come on, everybody is here."

I stifled a wince. "Everybody?"

"Well, this ispack business." He eyed me as we almost reached the house. "What are you so worried about?"

"Somehow I doubt that I'm welcome, Jake."

He shifted his gaze, inadvertantly comfirming my suspicion. "It's not you, Bella." He kept his voice light. "At least, not yet."

"Jacob."

He stopped pulling me forward, sighed and turned to face me. "Whatever that's coming for us, it's not your fault. Will you please stop blaming yourself for everything?"

"I will when it stops being my fault."

"You're being silly."

"It's fact. The Volturi won't even come here in the first place if it wasn't for me."

"Fault is not the problem here, okay? We'll deal with it."

I frowned, needing him to understand. "The Volturi is nothing like the new born vampires, Jacob. I--" He lifted his hands and held my head between his two large, hands, I felt grateful for the warmth of his hands against my skin. "We'll discuss fault later, okay. Now, I don't know about you but I'm hungry and from the deliciouslooking smells that are coming out of this house, Emily is cooking, and if we keep discussing about this out here, there will be no more food for me because my brothers will attack her like starved wolves."

It was weak, but I couldn't help but smile at the helpless, pleading woebegone look in his dark brown eyes. "Fine."

My heart twisted when his face brighten with that smile; the one that warmed me up from the crown of my head to the tips of my frozen toes. He watched me shudder and frowned, pulling me to the terrace. "Besides, you have to get out of the cold."

Jacob's smile was sly and amused when he caught me squaring my shoulders, his hand reaching for mine before he swung the door open..

The scene that greeted me was right out of every mother's nightmare.

Half naked boys were lounging around a table that groaned over the weight of rows and stacks of plates, bare feet and huge, half of them were sitting on the counters. I blinked when I saw Colin and Brady waved at me, almost as big and long as Seth at one of the corners of the room, gulping down a large pile of scrambled eggs each.

I huffed out a breath, I forgot how big, how vital all were, it was as if the air was electrified by their gathered presence. They were an eye catching sight all on their own, together they were an immovable force to contend with. Just stepping into the room felt like she passed through some kind of static web that pressed against her.

Jacob ducked his head over the doorframe, dragging me along. "There better still be some of that food for me."

Emily slided up among the walls of bodies, Bella blinked at the ease of how she made her way--a shift of feet, a poke here, an elbow shoved there--toward us. She looked like she was amused by my overwhelmed expression and engulped me in an embrace that I gratefully return just because she was normal, and at least she was smiling. "Bella, how are you?" She kissed my cheek, and I found out that although the scars were still there, still vivid, but I hardly saw them anymore. She looked beautiful to me, and comfortable and at home. "You look good."

"Thank you, Emily." I smiled, simply because I couldn't not to, looking into her happy face but inside, I was still cautious. "You do, too."

"I saved you some, Jacob. It's in the oven." She said without taking her eyes off of me.

Emily rolled his eyes at me when Jacob exhuberently hugged her and kissed her scarred cheek. "Blessyou, Emily."

His eyes met mine in reassurance before he raced Seth to the oven. She shifted to my side, her arm hooked around mine and waited for me to clear my mind. I looked around along the path of desruction and mayhem--waved at Embry and Quil who grinned back, their mouths busy with chewing on something--my eyes went over everything twice before coming back to look at her. "How long till you get use to it?"

Emily laughed again and pulled me in. "Oh, Bella. I hope I never do."

I laughed at Jacob and Seth when they fought over the last sausage, only to lose it to Brady. Eventually, they ganged up on him on the last cookie. It bothered me, how comfortable I was here now that my anxiety about my welcome was dismissed, how easy they accepted me back into their circle. Of course, I also noticed that Paul, Jared, Leah and Sam weren't there, so perhaps, the jury was still out.

"Sam's talking with the council." I blinked when Jacob answered my thoughts. When I stared, he merely pulled at the edges of my hair. "Quiet, Bella. Always watching, always thinking."

"What's so wrong about that?"

He eyebrows disappeared into his hairline. "Why so defensive?"

I opened my mouth to deny but closed it again and thought of something to say. "I'm here to warn you but you won't let me."

He shrugged. "We'll get there eventually, Bells. For now, just relax, we have to wait for the council anyway, might as well enjoy the moment."

It wasn't until an hour later that the rowdy bunch turned eeriely silent, their attention orbiting to the door. I paused with a stack of dried plates in my hand waiting for whatever they were waiting on to show up, the only one that went about her business was Emily, who hummed as she rearranged the numerous plates and cooking ware.

Finally, the door cracked open and I held my breath when Sam, Jared, Paul and Leah entered in successive order. I put the plates in my hand on the table when their eyes instantly zoomed on me, their faces quiet and unreadable.

Jacob appeared beside me like a friendly shadow.

From the way he stood beside me--protective, defensive--I know there was dissension among the ranks, that not all of them welcomed my arrival as easily as Jacob had.

Well, that was to be expected.

Even though I was human, I was one of themnow. One of the Cullens.

Not to mention, I have a knack to bring trouble into their land.

But somehow, I know that it wasn't just that, it wasn't just their tribe they were concern about. I already noticed the way Quil and Embry watched us, their dark eyes dissecting every look and smile. I noticed the way their brows lift when they saw our joined hands,--I wasn't quite ready to let him go just yet, still half sure that this was only a dream and when I wake up, it would have been too late--their brows wrinkled when they saw the russet wooden carving on my bracelet and the wedding band and engagement ring on the opposite hand.

Their watchfulness, the way their eyes glued to Jacob's face also gave me some clue as to how bad it was for Jacob when I left.

My heart ached when I felt his hand on the small of my back, urging me forward.

Sam was the one who greeted me first, shook my hand. "Bella."

"Sam." My little hand was lost in his big one, his dark eyes--wise and patient--probed mine. He smiled. "Marriage agrees with you."

I felt Jacob twitched beside me and I pulled my hand from Sam's grasp. "Thank you."

"How are the Cullens?"

"They are all very well."

"Your husband?"

I stared at Sam, wondering what he was trying to achieve with all the question either than to hurt Jacob. If he wanted to punish someone, surely it should be me. "Edward is fine, thank you for your concern."

I moved to greet the others but apparently Sam, wasn't finish. "How was the honeymoon?"

The hum of conversation stilled when Jacob stepped in front of me, a low growl climbing out of his throat and shivered along my spine, my eyes flashed at the two men but it was Leah who was the first to react. "That's enough. Maybe the two of you should go to your corners, huh?"

Maybe, if Leah's voice was opposing rather than tired, they would have ignored her but they backed away without taking their eyes of each other. Jared and Paul followed Sam into the kitchen while Jacob, Leah and me stayed in the living room with the others.

I looked at Jacob's dark expression and felt my insides twist. "Maybe I should go home for now."

Jacob lifted his head at that, I saw the panic that bloomed inside his eyes. "No, it's still early."

I looked to Leah who sighed. "The council will hear what you have to say tonight, at the bonfire. Until then, your time is yours."

I nodded and looked back to Jacob. "I can come by later."

"Why would you do that for? Come on, we'll spend some time in my house." He grinned, shamelessly using the brilliant smile that I love. "Like old times."

At the corner of my eyes, I saw Embry and Quil exchanged glum glances. "I don't think--"

As if he knew what I was thinking--which was usually the case--his face changed, the tone of his voice lowered. "Don'tthink. Other people can damn well mind their own business. We're not doing anything wrong." He pulled my hand. "Come on."

I glanced at the others from over my shoulder and saw their dark eyes following us, their looks burning a hole at my back.

We've arrive at his house in record time and I pulled on the edges of my jacket when Jacob called for Billy, I didn't know what to feel when Billy was nowhere to be found--relieved that I didn't have to answer any more questions or worried over the lack of buffer between Jacob and me. Jacob pulled out a couple of sodas from the fridge and lead the way to the--where else--garage.

I smiled as I followed, remembering the days where I spent my free time--whenever I wasn't mad at him--thinking of the days I spent here with him. We passed through the thick rows of trees and shrubbery that hid the house and everything else from view. It was easy to feel isolated, away from the house, away from other people, away from all the noise.

I screeched to a stop when I finally saw the garage. It was still the same, still made out of bolts, plastic, and wooden frames, but that was no surprise. I spent enough time there that I can probably build another one just like it, but it was the arrays of machines, cars, motorcycles that riddled the ground that caught my attention. Their guts spilled out on and under plastic tarp, wires hanging out of their openings like multicolored veins.

"Uh, Jacob. Are you running a chop shop?"

He snorted, pulled a plastic tarp off of a mangled carseat and sat on it. "I've been keeping busy."

I walked through the jungle of iron and shook my head. "I can see that. What are you doing with all this stuff?"

"It's not all mine, somebody told somebody that knows somebody that knows me that I could fix things and I figured it's about time I made some money for myself. It's not like I can get a part time job with my schedule, you know." he laughed. "Can you imagine me disappearing from a job because I have to phase like some superhero?"

I smiled at the laughter in his eyes and sat when he patted the seat beside him. "Not to mention if some customer pisses you off and you claw up his car or something."

He chuckled. "Nah, I don't do that anymore."

"Do what? Claw up the side of cars?"

He grinned. "Phase when I'm angry."

"Really? I thought anger triggers the phasing."

"It does. " He shrugged. "I just don't feel angry about being a werewolf anymore. I like being one. I'm over my teenwolf angst."

Suddenly, I remembered my latest conversation with Edward. "You're better at controlling yourself."

He deliberated over that for a few seconds and then nodded. "Yeah, I guess." He met my eyes. "I told you this, didn't I? I seem to have a better hold about this phasing bit than the others."

I nodded. "But last time, you were still a bit bitter about it. What changed?"

His eyes shifted, a hand came out to rubbed over his hair. Somehow I know it was something that I'd rather not know. "Because..it makes things easier I guess. It's not just our bodies that changes, Bella, our minds too; things are simpler, less complex, less..." He caught himself, quirked a small smile at me. "Just less. It's freeing."

We sat in silence, looking over the forest and the tattered ruins of his machines, sipping on cold sodas. It didn't take long for me to start shivering and for him to throw a hand over my shoulders, gathering me against his side to offer his body heat.

What he said swirl in my head and joined what Edward had said, it raced and twisted in my head and made me restless. Maybe he felt my tension because he ducked his head to look at my face. "What is it?"

We just met, it's not the right time, don't rock the boat, plead the little voice in my head but I shook it off, there will never be a right time, and our relationship has always been rocky anyway.

"Edward said something."

I felt him still, almost vampire-like if not for the quickening of his heart. "Yeah?"

"Yousaid that we would still be friends, no matter what I am."

He expression was less tense, more surprise and curious as if he was expecting something else from me. "I remember."

"Edward said it won't be that easy. Something about mortal enemies and the like."

His dark eyes swept over my face, I was certain he picked up certain emotions that I'd rather hide. Jacob was younger than me but in some ways he was more patient, more sensible, wiser although his emotions were more explosive than mine.

The kind that heats and blows up in your face before it cools down. Quick to anger, quick to apologize but rarely repentant.

"What did he tell you?"

I tried to read his face but it seems that he had some practice on his poker face. "He said that we would..."

"We would want to kill each other?"

I wondered if I looked as meek as I sound. "Yes."

"Does that bother you?" He asked, his tone of voice oh so matter of fact.

I frowned at him. "What do you take me for, Jacob? Of course, it does. Doesn't it bother you?"

His expression turned speculating before smoothing into the face that he used whenever he was trying to be calm. "Does it matter?"

I looked at the polite mask that he wore, not understanding. "What do you mean does it matter?"

He looked away to the woods, the sky was starting to darken with moody clouds, promising rain or snow. "It means just that, Bella. Does it matter?"

"Of course it matters."

His eyelids lowered and a small smile curved his wide lips. "I guess I should have asked does it matter enough?"

He saw the confusion in my eyes and shook his head slightly. "This is only a grace periode, isn't it? You still want to be a vampire, right?"

I paused before I finally nodded, but I knew that he knew that it wasn't because I have second thoughts but because I was unsure of what he was getting at.

"Then it doesn't matter." He shrugged his broad shoulders and stood, creating distance between us in guise of tossing away his empty can. My body missed his heat immediately. I watched his wide back, felt my stomach clutch at the way he hid away from me. "It matters, Jacob. It matters to me."

When he turned to look at me, his dark eyes were churning with bitterness and pain. "But not enough to make you change your mind."

We stared at each other, his words hovered in the empty space between us. I could deny it but we both would know it to be a lie.

He leaned against a car part that for the life of me, I couldn't named. "Do you know why Sam did what he did? Tossing those little reminders of who you are?"

"He's angry with me, isn't he?"

He shook his head. "No, he's not angry with you. He's angry with me."

His statement made me stared at him. "Why is he angry with you?"

It struck me, that this was the first time that I reallylooked at him since the first time I saw him again, the first time where I didn't see just one part of him--his eyes, his smile, his laugh--where I didn't concentrate on trying to see the shadow of my Jacob but all of him as a whole. His short hair looked like torn black satin, wisping across his broad, mature face. The darkness of his deep set eyes against his broad cheekbones, the straight nose and the wide, even lips. The strong line of his jaw--tight now--his expression settling down to one of youth. I stared at him, stared at how the escaping shafts of sunlight highlight his skin.

The look in his eyes quickened my heart, made the blood under my skin rushed faster. A part of me twisted in guilt and despair for his pain while another part, a part that has been dormant this last few months, turned restlessly and sighed.

He still loves me, parts of me agreed on the same conclusion although the feeling that resulted from it were so very different.

I wondered why that was such a surprise, after all, ever since I knew him, when everything else changed, his feelings for me was the one thing that hadn't.