The Passing Years-9Manipulation

“So, you’re Bella Swan.”

Since Bella had her back on whoever it was, she let the wince passed through her face. Oh, no. Not again, she thought as she turned towards her accuser and found herself staring into strangely familiar dark eyes though she didn’t recognize the face they belonged to.

Although it wasn’t a question, she confirmed her identity and waited for the scalding words. Much like if she was going to face a firing squad. But instead of words, she was treated to a silent yet intense stare, as if she was being scrutinized for every physical flaw there was. Evidently, by the satisfied sneer that widen her smile, she saw many. Her accuser was tall and slim but there was a toughness in the set of her jaw, in the unflinching blatant stare of her eyes, in the square of her shoulders and in the solid way she planted her feet. Something tickled at the back of Bella’s mind when the woman—surely this was no girl and what was it with Jacob and older women?—met her eyes after she finished her observation, making her feel like she was a suspicious yet insignificant smear on a precious, expensive carpet. It was a talent which Bella envied.

“Do I know you?” Bella managed to ask despite the sudden urge to shrink and jump into the nearest anthill.

The woman smiled but somehow Bella knew it wasn’t meant to be friendly. It was more like a baring of teeth.

“Bella.” Relieved for the interruption, she turned to see Seth bouncing over to her, filled to the brim with cheerful energy. “Come on, I need you.”

She couldn’t help but smile but she wrinkled her brow at him. “For what?”

The grin on his face grew. “For fun.”

It was either go with him or have her arm pulled from her body so she let him drag her away, as she turned to see where the other woman was standing, she was no longer there.

***

“I’ll fall.”

Jared grinned at the grim acceptance in Bella’s voice. “You’re not going to fall.”

“I will. You’ll see.” She eyed the ground that seemed so far away from where she was perched, which was from somewhere she never before thought she would ever end up on; Seth’s back. She had her arms around his neck with her legs around his waist. She waited to be uncomfortable and didn’t know how she should feel when she wasn’t, even when Seth put his hands on her tighs to hitch her up.

The expression on her face was a comical mix of dismay and resignation that Seth rolled his eyes. “I’m not going to drop you, Bella.”

“At least, not on purpose.” Quil grinned wickedly at her.

Seth frowned at both Bella and Quil. By the look on his face, Bella knew she had somehow injured his ego and since one of the Renee’s most repeated rare motherly advice was about the fragility of the male ego, she made haste to rectify her mistake. “I know you won’t, Seth.” She patted his shoulder as she jumped down. “It’s not you I’m worried about.”

Kim smiled one of her shy smiles at her, she also jumped down from Jared’s back. “Then what are you worried about?”

“That I’m going to somehow lose my grip, fall backward and of course I’m going to hit my head on something so I’ll end up being dragged across the race path.” She maintained her grim expression even as the others laughed at her. “You’ll have to get rid of my body, oh, and think what it will do to Charlie when he had to arrest all of you.”

Embry scratched his chin, the smile on his face twitched. “Don’t be ridiculous, Bella. Of course we’ll dig you a grave.”

Paul chuckled. “We’ll even get you a headstone.”

“We’ll bring you flowers and I’ll promise to get all choked up.” Quil put in his two cents. “It’s the least we can do.”

“Gee, thanks.”

The smatter of laughter only grew at her sarcastic reply.

“What’s the joke?” Jacob stood beside Quil, his eyes searched their faces until they landed on Bella who fought not to wince. Leah’s words echoed in her mind, shooting ragged needles of ice into her heart as the sight of his face.

“Bella’s going to fall.” Embry told him.

“Hit her head.” Paul continued.

“Get dragged by Seth.” Quil picked up the conversation baton.

Seth laughed. “Die.”

Jared patted Jacob’s shoulders. “We’ll have to dig her a grave.”

Bella blinked as Kim’s lips curved into a perfect replication of Jared’s. “And give her flowers every year.”

Jacob brows lifted into his hairline. “Right.” His eyes dropping to Bella’s flushing face. “You’re psychic now?”

“I was just saying.” She mumbled into her veil of hair and felt a current of shock ran over her spine when he pushed it away from her face to curve over her shoulder in a lush tangle of brown, the tips of his fingers grazing the stretch of her neck, slid down the length of her arm from her shoulder down to her elbow before falling to his side. “You’re not going to fall, Bella. Won’t she, Seth?”

If it registered to anyone that Jacob’s gesture was as intimate as it was proprietary, nobody mentioned it, although interested careful eyes flicked back and forth at both of them, not as subtle as they intended to be. No one hadn’t thought to mention the subtle warning in Jacob’s mild voice either.

Bella didn’t know what to say but was wishing really hard for someone to say something to fill the sudden silence that thrummed over the group, she could feel their eyes on her and she was trying not to lift her hand and rub the spot where Jacob’s fingers touched her skin. Bella should have felt relieved if not for the sudden solemnity in Seth’s; Yes, I’m not going to drop her, Jacob.

It sounded more like a promise than assurance.

“Seth—.”

“I won’t.” The younger boy’s voice dripped with insult and hurt.

“I know.” Jacob rolled his eyes. “I just want to remind you and all of you to tone it down a little.”

Seth drew his brow together. “What?”

Jacob blew an exasperated breath as the others chuckled. “I know that she’s tiny.”

Bella snapped out of her reverie enough to say and affronted; Hey!, which of course they ignored.

“But act like you’re actually carrying something, all right?”

“Oh.” Seth flashed them a grin. “OK.”

Jared craned his head when the crowd started to disperse and gather at the sidelines, clearing a path for the race. “I think it’s going to start. Up, Kim.”

Bella climbed obligingly onto Seth’s back who remembered to hunched over as if she weighed a ton. “I’m not that heavy, Seth.”

The wry tone in Bella’s voice made Jacob snicker.

The glower on Bella’s face tightened when out of nowhere someone jumped onto Jacob’s back and clung. Jacob grunted then as if he just remembered his own advice, swayed in afterthought, it was kind of funny if Bella’s wasn’t so shocked. Jacob merely looked over his shoulder, “Give a guy a warning before you do that, will ya?”

Bella gaped when she realized that the woman who was making herself comfortable on Jacob’s back was the same woman who gave her the once over.

She didn’t know what bothered her more; the fact that she was cheerfully trading insults with Jacob in a very camaraderie kind of way or that Jacob was letting her.

“Bella, hey.” Seth tapped her arms that were wrapped around his neck. “Ease up. You’re choking me.”

“Oh, sorry.” Was it bad of her to feel a shot of smugness when Jacob wore an annoyed expression on his face? Bella wondered. Was it worse that she really couldn’t find it within herself to care if it was?

“Bells.” Jacob jerked his head to indicate the woman at his back. “This bane of my existence is—“

“We’ve met.” The woman cut him off with a feline smile. “Haven’t we?”

Since the smile she sent to Bella was the same peculiar smile that conveyed anything but pleasantries, Bella nodded. Cautiously.

Jacob’s eyes narrowed on Bella’s tense face. “You did, huh?”

The woman sneered. “Yeah, we did. Problem?”

Before Jacob could say anything, Paul gave out an oomph when Leah jumped on his back. From the way Paul had to take a few steps forward to steady himself, it seemed that Leah had given herself a running start.

Rachel laughed. “Hey, Leah.”

Leah fluttered her eyelashes. “Hey, Rach.”

Paul frowned. “Did you guys plan this?”

Rach? Bella’s eyes whipped back to the woman’s face. As in Rachel? As in Jacob’s sister?

As she processed the new information, the pieces fell and filled the empty spaces of the puzzle. She now saw the similarities between the siblings, felt the whole sibling vibe. No wonder she looked like she was ready to rip my head off.

Bella shifted uneasily against Seth’s back when Rachel’s knowing eyes met hers, especially when she exchanged glances with Leah. She was so not up to battling the two of them, especially if they’re working together.

“I never thought that my brother would someday carry me in the race. I feel old.”

Jared grinned. “You’re what? Twenty three? Yeah, you’re ancient.”

“Shut up youngling. Bow to the wisdom of the ages.”

Leah snorted, her breath sent Jared’s short hair flying. “I always thought it pretty sexist. It’s like the old days again, where a good man is a strong man. It’s the equivalent of guys taking a ruler to their dicks.”

Laughter sputtered from the guys.

“Well,” Rachel patted Jacob’s shoulder. “I agree in testing a man’s worth. A guy has to be strong enough to carry his woman in case of an emergency, like throwing us out of a window if there was a fire or something. That’s all we’ll ever need from you guys anyway.”

Bella choked on a smile at the affronted looks on the guys faces, including Jacob’s at the condescending tone in Rachel’s voice. “I’ll throw you out of a window, Rach. Even if there isn’t a fire.” Jacob muttered.

It was against Quil’s nature to let such a provocative statement go without a fight, so he fastened a leer on his face. “Oh, I can think of a few other things.”

Rachel sniffed at the slow masculine chuckles that rumbled through the guys and looked down her straight nose at them. “It’s because of that kind of attitude that Tia broke up with you in second grade, Quil.”

Even if that was way over and done, and because it was exactly way over and done hence it should stay that way, Quil considered it as a hit below the belt and couldn’t resist to get away with a few solid jabs as well. “It’s because of that kind of attitude that you can’t keep a man, Rach.”

Rachel narrowed her eyes, looking so much like Jacob that Bella had to blink a few times, but she only said one word. “Embry.”

“Ow.” Quil rubbed the back of his head and skewered Embry with a pained and betrayed look. Embry gave a nervous laugh, like he didn’t believe he actually hit Quil because Rachel told him to, but she sounded so much like Jacob. “Sorry, man. Reflex.”

Rachel cackled with glee even as Jacob grinned.

Bella watched over Seth’s shoulder as they walked over to the start line, listening to the bickering familiarity of the pack and those who knew and kept their secret which made them essentially family. And although she was standing among them, she felt as if she was watching them from across a glass wall and it made her heart felt stretched and twisted. Now, like when the sudden realization that she was no longer and will never be a Cullen smote her with the force of a battering ram, the fact that she left more than just Jacob in Forks hit her between the eyes like a well aimed brick. Between Leah’s words, Jacob’s reticence and then this, Bella only wanted to crawl into bed and stay there for a few weeks.

She was wallowing in self pity and so lost in thought that she didn’t see the two pairs of similar dark eyes that silently watched her.

She surfaced from wallowing only when a whoop of laughter ran through the crowd when the line of young men that entered the race all ran simultaneously without waiting for the ‘go’ mark.

“Isn’t this cheating?” Bella tightened her hold on Seth, the rocks along the straight long path didn’t look comfortable at all. Jared who ran beside them gasped out a, “Yes.”

Bella watched with wide eyes when Jared, Kim grinning on his back, hooked his foot around the ankle of the man who was running in front of them and pulled, sending the man and his female baggage sprawling on the ground. “Sorry Chris, maybe next time.” He chortled and jumped over them, dodging the hands that tried to grab his ankles.

“Uh, isn’t that also cheating?”

Kim sighed when her boyfriend let out a victorious yell. “Cheating is actually required.”

“This is no sport for pansies. This is for men.” Paul hollered as he passed them, Leah whooping a storm like she was a warrior in a raiding party on his back. “Later girls.”

“Oh, hell no.” Jared dug his barefoot in the ground and quickened his pace, so did Seth. Jacob appeared at their side, grinning. “I said tone it down, at least show some effort.”

Seth snorted when Jacob passed them, Rachel blowing them kisses as they streaked passed them. “He just wants to win.”

“We can’t have that.”

Bella groaned when Seth and Jared exchanged a wide grin.

It was no wonder really, with all the hooking, grabbing, elbowing, pulling, kicking, biting that was going on, the race was cut short and the only contestants left was the pack members that actually participated. Bella wanted to say it was unfair because of their reflex, strength, speed and stamina, but really, since cheating was a requirement, and what was being a werewolf in a race not cheating?, her argument was moot. She rolled her eyes when they, hardly breathing hard and not even breaking a sweat, discussed the outcome of the race.

“Whose turn it is to win?” Paul asked to nobody in particular.

“I think it’s Jacob’s.” Kim answered.

“I won six months ago.” Jacob joined in the discussion.

“Me. Me.” Seth even raised his right hand, he would’ve jumped in excitement if Jacob hadn’t sent him a look.

Bella was torn between smiling and being unnerved when the older pack members sneered in that disturbingly similar way they could do, and for the first time Bella saw that even Leah held that pack trait. “Please, Seth. It’s your first time.” Leah smirked. “You can’t win on your first time.”

“Besides.” Paul dug the knife a little deeper. In a brotherly way of course. “Who’ll believe that you can win over us?”

“I never get to win over anything.”

“Don’t pout baby bro. It’s too cute.”

They teased him for the remainder of the path until finally one by one they slowed until Seth—busily brooding and sulking—passed the finish line, not realizing that he actually won until people rushed to congratulate him. Bella dropped to the ground grinning at Seth’s flushed face, at least until she realized that as one, the crowd was looking at her. Waiting for what she didn’t know, so she merely looked back.

Bella watched the grin that grew on Quin’s face with trepidation; she had spent enough time around him to know what that particular grin meant. It didn’t help when she also noticed the embarrassed chagrin look on Seth’s face. “Guys, I don’t think Bella knows.”

The explosive laughter from the crowd that was mainly made out of men had a hint of something that brought a rush of blood rush up to Seth’s cheeks. “I’m sorry, Bella. I totally forgot.”

“What?” Bella’s eyes flicked back to the pack’s faces who looked rueful. At least, most of them, Jacob looked like he was uncertain what look to wear on his face while Leah’s was amused. Rachel however was watching his brother very closely. Embry took hold of Seth’s shoulders and pushed him in front of her. Bella stared at Seth who was trying to look at anything but her.

“Kiss him, Bella.”

Bella blinked. “What?”

“Kiss him. “Quil snickered. “As a gift and a thank you, honoring him for giving you victory.”

Paul shrugged. “It’s a guy Indian tribe thing.”

“Oh.” Bella looked up at Seth, embarrassment turning her stomach to knots, not to mention the numbers of eyes watching. And then, there was Jacob who she really didn’t want to think about. But, Seth looked even more uncomfortable, more embarrassed, not to mention guiltily mortified than she was. The apology was there in his eyes that she couldn’t help but feel tickled by the situation.

Oh, what the hell, Bella squared her shoulders, channeled her inner Lulu, raised herself on her tip toes and pressed her lips firmly against Seth’s then pulled away with a loud smack.

Seth blinked, confused but grinned when the crowd cheered. She grinned back at him although her brows wrinkle where it deepened when she heard snickers from the pack. “What?”

It was Quil who answered, a laugh trembling along his throat. “You could’ve just kissed him on his cheek, you know.”

She didn’t bother to block the tide of red that rushed up her face. “What? Why didn’t you tell me?”

Embry blinked his brown eyes, looking as innocent as a lamb. “We thought you knew.”

Temper sparked her eyes. “The hell you did.” She knew she would get nowhere with the guys so she aimed a look at Kim who tried to stifle a smile as she said, “I tried. I really did, but—“

“Oh, come on Bella, think of it as a good deed.” Paul ruffled Seth’s hair who growled a warning at him. “Give the kid a thrill.”

“I’ve kissed girls before.”

Leah gave her brother a pitying look. “Mom doesn’t count.”

Seth’s face screwed up. “Oh, ew, Leah.”

Embry’s face was the very picture of disappointment. “Men don’t say things like ew.”

“Yuck is acceptable.” Quil nodded sagely. “Ick, well, that depends upon the situation but mainly, we suffer in silence.”

Bella was hard pressed not to stomp her foot, but a sudden flash to the last time she did that and Jacob’s reaction to it, stopped her. Her thoughts made her look up to Jacob and found that his eyes were on her. His face showed nothing, it was set into pleasant but unreadable lines. It was the look in his eyes that froze her breath and heart, but before she could decipher the emotions behind the dark depths, Jacob lowered his eyelids and blinked; a long sweep of eyelashes that told nothing of his thoughts and when they opened and met hers once again, they were as deep as they were unfathomable.

***

She wanted to go home. No, not Charlie’s place but her own home, the home she made herself and most importantly for herself that was filled with her things that solely belonged to only her. She wanted her own sets of friends; Lulu, Misha, Tina and Brian who had no secrets, no hidden thoughts, at least not when it pertains to her. At least, not that she knew of. She tried to find Tina, even Matt or Gabe as soon as she escaped the watchful eyes of the Pack but she couldn’t find them. Leah’s words were slamming around in her skull so hard that it echoed down her ribs.

What was she doing here anyway? What did she want? What did she expect? That things can just go on the way it was? What?

What did she want? What did she want from Jacob?

You broke him. You ground him into dust.

Could I do that to him again? The question stopped her in her tracks. Could I do that to him again? The double meaning of the question was suddenly clear to her. She was able to break his heart because he loved her.

Does he love her now? Does she want him to? Is that why she’s here?

Bella shook her head and weaved her way through the crowd, bumping into people but seeing nobody as she mutter apologies.

Surely four years was enough to get over somebody? She ignored the mocking laugh that rose in her mind.

It took her a second to realized that she’d stopped walking and then another to realize why. A hand was on her arm, unmoving and strong…and burning. She didn’t need to look to know who that hand belonged to.

“Where are you going?”

Was there a thread of tenderness in the firmness of his voice? Was it hope that twisted her insides? Or dread? Bella kept her eyes down. “Home.”

“Why?”

“I’m tired.”

“Why?”

Irritation shot through Bella, stiffening her spine, making her pull her hand away but Jacob held fast.

“Who are you going with?”

“Charlie.” She tried to pull away again but still he didn’t let go. She wondered whether there was a metaphor in there somewhere. An analogy perhaps?

“Charlie went home with my dad a couple of minutes ago.”

Bella didn’t know whether it was her imagination but she thought she heard a hint of smugness in that sentence.

“I’ll ask Gabe or Matt.”

“No.”

The brisk and short refusal, as if he had any right to stop from doing anything she chose, shocked her enough that she snapped her eyes to his. “What?”

Not ‘why’, why would give him the impression that she accepted his refusal but ‘what’ would serve as the self righteous; ‘how dare you?’ which was no question at all, more of an exclamation really.

“They have to help with the cleaning crew.”

No, there was no denying it. There was a certain smugness, a taste of bitter satisfaction in the tone of his voice that raised her hackles. She often pondered—once it didn’t hurt and then as time passed, when she wasn’t so busy—why Jacob always managed to make her angrier than everyone she knew combined. Why it was always so hard to forgive him when he betrayed a confidence, when he did something that she didn’t like.

Harder than it ever was with other people.

“Fine. I’ll take the bus.”

His eyes narrowed on her face. “What bus? Where are you going?”

“Home.”

His eyes darkened as he realized what she meant. “You can’t.”

“Excuse me?”

“It’s too late.”

Today is just full with double meanings it seem, Bella pulled harder on her hand but it was no use. It was like trying to move a truck with her pinky.

“Besides, you promised.”

“I didn’t promise you anything.”

The silence between them that followed her harsh declaration was bursting with layers of meanings. Too many to discuss, too many to dissect, too many to even try to understand.

Jacob’s voice was mild, controlled. His eyes shuttered. “But you promised my father. Breakfast, tomorrow.”

Bella gritted her teeth as she remembered. “Rain check.”

“No. You’ll come.”

“I make my own decisions, Jake.”

“Then make the right ones.”

There were tears in her eyes and she didn’t know how it got there or why it was there at all. “I did.”

How did it come to this? Bella asked herself.

There used to be no secrets between them, nothing that they couldn’t talk about. Theirs were a no-bars-hold-take-no-prisoners kind of relationship. They were too impatient to put on kid gloves, to even think of putting them on. There was no such thing as too much honesty between them.

If it hurts, they’ll bleed. If it’s good, they’ll burst out with laughter

Finally, finally he released her arm and she felt both relief and panic set in, scattering her pulse.

“You’ll come with Charlie to our house tomorrow.”

She glared at his back through her tears as he walked away from her, the sight of it heightened her anger simply because it hurt. And even though she knew exactly what she sounded like if she did, she mumbled out a sullen, “Why should I?”

“Because you know we can’t afford any broken promises.”

As she watched him walked into the crowd, she found the answer to her ponderings.

Why does Jacob always manage to make her angrier than everyone she knew combined? Why was it always so hard to forgive him when he betrayed a confidence, especially when he did something that she didn’t like?

Why was it so much harder for her to forgive him than other people?

The answer was simple.

Because, out of all those people, he knew her.

Because, out of all those people, she expected him to know her most of all.